During the tube strike last month I had to endure a ghastly bus journey to get me to work. It was horrid. I was sat beside a mother and her son (her husband and daughter were on the seats on the other side). They were a nice Scottish family who had decided to take a nice vacation into London....... stupid, stupid idea.
When they first settled I tried to be polite and offered my seat up so the son could sit but the mother declined and plopped the boy right on her lap. After about five minutes the kids started "mum, I want to sit down... make her move... I'm tired... mover her... I want to look out the window... make her move..." and basically being a rude little shit. I asked the mother if she wanted me to move but again, she politely declined. Yet she didn't shut her son up.
Now, for people who have kids they can shrug it off and say 'kids just do that' but personally it really pisses me off. I mean, how rude is that? If I did the same thing people wouldn't accept it and would tell me to stop. And that's when I started to think, why can kids get away with that kind of behaviour? Isn't it something you should nip in the bud quickly to prevent your kids growing up to be a shit? This kid was far too old to be acting like that.
Part of me wants to start doing kid-esque things in public just to see how understanding and considerate others would be towards me..... I bet they wouldn't. Now, I know full well that when I was younger that I did all these things (that are listed below) when I was younger. My mum loves pointing these out. Apparently I was a fucking idiot when I was a kid. This is something I struggle to deal with, as I hate kids but for things I put my own mother through. I am a walking, talking psych case.
Anyways, back to my list. These are things that kids are allowed to do that adults are not. I personally think we should be allowed to, because if a child sees and adult being stupid it may make them reconsider their own behaviour.
Say Exactly Whats On Their Mind
If I was ever in the middle of a conversation and I lost interest, I still have to endure the rest of the conversation because society dictates that as the norm. Announcing "I'm bored now" and just walking off is not proper decorum.
If I was bought a present and I didn't like it, I couldn't pass it back and declare "I don't like it" because that would hurt the persons feelings.
If I went into a public toilet and someone had clearly just been and it was pungent, I'm not allowed to shout "it stinks in here" because the other women would feel embarrassed.
Fall Asleep Anywhere
I was on a bus once and the kid sitting next to me fell asleep and landed on my lap. I turned to his mother expecting her to lift him off but instead she gave me a "aww, look at him all tuckered out" look and smiled. How is this acceptable? If I fell asleep in her kids lap I'd get arrested, yet he could do what he wanted? And when I asked the mother (politely) to move her child she glared at me like I was the bad guy. I couldn't quite get my head around it.
I miss the days when I was young where I'd fall asleep in the car and wake up in bed. I can't do that now. It's not fair.
Kick People
A few years ago, at my sisters wedding, my nephew was going through a bit of a phase and throughout the whole reception he kept kicking me. Under the table, on the dance floor, a quick boot to the shin. It was really irritating. I told his mum (my other sister) what was happening but because she didn't see it she couldn't tell him off. So I decided to. He gave me one final boot and I flipped, and called him a jerk. To be fair, considering my expansive vulgar language fluency everyone should be grateful I didn't say anything worse. However just saying jerk really pissed everyone else off. I get that he was just a kid but I had enough. If I went round kicking people I'd get punched in the face.
Cry
This one you can get away with but you would be considered mentally unstable. I really wish I could just stay at home watching Netflix all day, but I can't cry and snot to get my own way, so why should kids? This is something that really needs to be stopped quickly because its rather dickish behaviour. I see kids every day bawling their eyes out over tiny, stupid things. I know I can cry at times just because I forgot something or dropped something, but that is usually due to a buildup of emotion. I don't cry hourly over stupid shit.
Pee Their Pants
This one is a little different because little kids have little bladders and sometimes you just can't help the fact that a kid pees, it's just the acceptance I don't think is fair. If I was to ever piss my drawers I would be laughed at and teased for the rest of my life, but apparently you can't do the same to kids because its 'damaging'. I always make it to the toilet in time, I understand the feeling of needing to go and and I have a large, strong bladder, so if any slipped out it'd be down to an illness or something.
I know a lot of adults who have peed their pants, but that has just been due to sever inebriation, that doesn't count.
Along with this, peeing the bed is widely accepted with children because it's like a right of passage. They can't tell they need to go until... whoops, they went. But the acceptance stops when you reach a certain age, usually around the 7-10 mark.
I can't tell you the amount of times I've gone to the toilet in my dream and then *just* woke up in time just as I was about to release. But I can't admit that out loud because the teasing would start.
Throw Tantrums and Act the Prat
Sometimes I really REALLY want chocolate, but I don't have the money for it. I wish I could throw myself on the floor, kicking and screaming until my mum turns up and buys it for me. But she never does, because I am old enough to know how fucking rude tantrum throwing is. When I used to work in HMV I ran the Children's section for a while and the amount of times I saw kids screaming like banshees because they wanted a DVD, throwing all the stock around because they couldn't get their own way.... its one of the reasons I hate kids as much as I do. Asshole behaviour.
Sit With Their Legs Wide Open, Flashing Knickers.
This one REALLY bugs me. Why can't parents teach young girls early how to sit like a human. This whole spread eagle stuff is gross, especially considering all the dangers there are in the world, and all the pervs who stare, you would try and do your best to avoid it all. This isn't me saying if a kid sits spread eagle they deserve the attention, I'm just saying its best to avoid it.
Be Fucking Gross.
Picking noses and wiping it places, digging and scratching places without any dignity.... it's gross. I feel physically sick just thinking of it. I know a lot of adults who still do this, and I hate them for it. I remember a few years ago seeing a girl literally digging her asshole on a packed bus. And the mother didn't even stop her. I mean, that is just wrong on a million levels.
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